Cycle of Abuse

A recurring pattern of abusive behavior followed by apology, reconciliation, and return to abuse — common in both relationships and institutions.

• You were harmed by a leader who apologized and was forgiven, only to harm again.

• You saw patterns of harm repeated in the church/community with no consequences.

• You felt conflicted loyalty to an abusive group that also "loved" you.

Potential clinical implications (especially in high control settings)

• Difficulty recognizing or exiting abusive cycles.

• Attachment wounds and emotional dysregulation.

• Confusion between love, control, and harm.